Welcome, 2017! Make yourself at home. You’ll be here for a while.
Don’t mind the mess. I’ve been working on my goals. Yes, the same goals every year. I’m hoping one day to meet at least one of them.
Thanks for throwing confetti and singing dance songs. I know you’re just trying to get me to smile. I’m sorry I’m not much for partying right now. It’s been a rough start, ruminating on all the things I thought I would have accomplished with half of my life already over. My boyfriend says I’m successfully living Plan B. But, honestly, who wants to proudly say they aren’t achieving their goals, but life is good?
My boyfriend insists the goals I have set out for myself can only be obtained through luck, and it’s not my fault that I’m unlucky.
He’s not the only one who believes this myth. My youngest sister says we were cursed by Di Suk, the oldest uncle on the Chinese side of the family, who said we weren’t really Lams because we were girls and we would eventually marry and become part of our husbands’ families. None of the Lam girls are currently married. They might have been married, but they’re divorced now. They might be dating or living with a man, but they have never become part of anyone else’s family. They are still Lams. My youngest sister says the curse can be broken if one of us marries a Chinese man. She is currently dating an Asian in the hopes of breaking the curse.
I’m not superstitious although I am religious and some people say it’s the same thing. I believe there is a Higher Power who guides the universe and that His Will is often not my own. Often I’ve prayed to align myself with God’s Will in the hopes of reconciling my life with a life of the Greater Good. Only I think I’m miserable because of it.
I know you’re about new beginnings, 2017, and you didn’t come here to listen to me complain, which has become a daily habit, from what you’ve said. I just wish I had already marked those goals off my spreadsheet and created something new to work toward and achieve.
At least I’m not like the people who risk their lives to climb Mt. Everest. Some die even after reaching the top. I don’t know if it’s a happy ending or not. But at the very least, they’ve accomplished something.
Oh, all right. I’ll indulge you with a toast. Here’s to working toward one goal this year, even if it means we must die, either physically or metaphysically, because without a goal there is no passion, and without passion, there is no reason for living, and living is what we are here to do, right, 2017?